Comfort Zones

Has this journal entry ever made it into your life?

Went to a seminar yesterday. It was GREAT! I learned so much and was motivated to succeed! Afterwards a group of us chatted non-stop on the way to our car—ohmiword, it was awesome and I felt totally connected to my dream! Then I went home, plopped my ass in front of the laptop, and… NOTHING. The magic was gone. Poof!!! Just like THAT and I lost that lovin’ feeling! WTF did I do wrong?! Help meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee… I’ve lost my passion and I don’t know what to do!!!!

If this particular snippet of hell sounds familiar, then either I have you on speed dial or you just entered a new phase on your path to realizing your dream that I call…

Shit or GET OFF the Pot!!!

Inevitably it seems that this new boom-boom-pow phase was preceded by a realization that it’s time to…

PUSH through your COMFORT ZONE!!!!!

In my world, busting through a comfort zone is usually a decision precursor’ed by a random series of hellish events that I view as SQUARE ONE—where you’re pissed, depressed, frustrated as all get out, and ready to quit this dream of being successful… all because you feel like you can’t freaking get your act together… which leaves you shouting at the top of your lungs…

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!!!!!

No shit. Enough is enough. So let’s jump off this crazy train, have a discussion about another way to look at this cyclic hellish torture device, and take one giant step toward moving on with our life.

Right after a short bio break.

Hi, my name is Elijana Kindel. I am a writer and process development scientist—not a life coach. What’s my shtick? My education, background, and passion for writing have combined to give me a different perspective on how to approach a given situation. To my mind and belief, nothing is too convoluted, damaged, or whacked that it can’t be broken down, torn apart then understood to be rebuilt from a new perspective. Granted, it’s messy and requires hard work, dedication, and a strong desire to succeed, but, hey, that’s why they came up with the slogan:

No Pain—No Gain

Bio break done. Now, on with the show…

Today’s post is about me sharing some hard earned advice with you on how I approach my particular brand of cyclic hell (as described in the aforementioned journal entry) and push myself to break on through the other side.

So without further ado, here it is—my hard earned advice…

COMFORT ZONES SUPPORT NETWORKS WITHIN   YOU

Advice delivered—WTF does it mean?  Glad you asked. To begin, let’s break this catchy phrase down into its three major components, starting with accepting this nugget o’ wisdom:

COMFORT ZONES EXIST FOR A REASON

The reason is SELF PRESERVATION. Any complex living being has the ability to adapt to a given environment. Adaptation happens to improve chances of survival—think here: Survival of the Fittest.  Comfort zones are coping mechanisms adopted into one’s everyday routine that ENABLE one to survive comfortably within a given environment.  And yes, by comfortably, I’m stressing that the given situation is not slam packed filled with stressors that trigger a FIGHT OR FLIGHT response. So in a nutshell, you can say that comfort zones are constructed to stop/avoid anxiety and/or panic triggered (once upon a time) by a Fight or Flight response.

To make sure we’re all on the same page in this fairy tale, let’s look at what happens when you step out of your comfort zone into a stressful situation. It’s a cascade that looks something like this… step out of comfort zone and encounter a stressful situation—this triggers the fight or flight response—this dumps a boatload of hormones and panic into your system—this wakes up your inner Knight In Shining Armor who sees a damsel in distress—Knight In Shining Armor makes a snap decision based on all the facts he has at his disposal AT THAT MOMENT IN TIME and decides to… enact a STRATEGIC RETREAT back to a known comfort zone or CHARGE!!! Full Speed ahead! All hands battle stations!

An interesting thing to note in all of this is that Knights In Shining Armor are inherently lazy. Okay, so maybe lazy is harsh. They are heroes who enjoy the hell out of their creature comforts—which is why they’ll opt to stay in a tavern, nursing a pint of stale ale, while regaling the buxom barmaids with tales of their heroic deeds last week, when there are a bunch of other Knights In Shining Armor hanging around protecting their damsel in distress.  This is just medieval lingo for saying that Knights In Shining Armor respect the true power of…

SUPPORT NETWORKS

True Support Networks ENABLE you to feel safe—dare I say comfortable? Yeah, I dare; ergo, we get nugget o’ wisdom #2:

SUPPORT NETWORKS ENABLE COMFORT ZONES

Friends and family are great, but if they’re not giving you the support you need for the task at hand (say, following your dream of becoming a successful entrepreneur) then… find someone who can give you the support you need, in the manner you crave it, when you’re at your most vulnerable—aka, like when you’re sitting ALONE at your desk about to start your business day.

Anyone notice something wonky about that previous sentence? How can you find someone to support you when you’re sitting ALONE at your desk? Simple, get a talisman. A symbol. A mantra. A reminder. Then plunk it down on your desk or carry it with you everywhere that reminds you of the support you have from your support network. Look folks, this isn’t a new concept. Millions of Christians do this every day by wearing a necklace with a cross—hanging a cross in their home—praying each night—praying each morning—making weekly church trips to reconnect with the peeps in their support network.  If it can work for a worldwide religion with millions of followers for hundreds of years… then it can work for you to ENABLE a Support Network…

WITHIN   YOU

Newsflash—YOU ARE MASTER OF YOUR OWN DESTINY. You choose your FATE. You choose your PATH. You have Freewill. When you stand in your comfort zone and decide to change your life, your Knight In Shining Armor will support You—IF you give him what he needs. (Wow, that’s a really big IF.)

Now… *deep breath* all together now…

What does YOUR inner Knight In Shining Armor need to help you get this show on the road?

COMFORT ZONES that SUPPORT NETWORKS WITHIN   YOU

Let that sink in for a minute while I tie up a loose end and revisit the journal entry from the beginning of the post…

The motivational seminar had a lot of great ideas and energy that were carried over into parking lot discussions, BUT… what I failed to do was consolidate that positive energy and associated concepts into a SYMBOL that would ENABLE me to SUCCEED when sitting ALONE at my desk (aka, I failed to create a new ‘comfort zone’ that would support networks (established by interacting with other like-minded successful entrepreneurs at the seminar and parking lot) within me).

For me, remedying that situation involved organization and clarity of purpose (focus) on my business. This is represented by an item—my journal/planner. It’s portable, holds info, organizes my day, and sits open on my desk. Taped to the inside of the back flap are quotes that inspire me to greatness along with a cheat sheet for things I worry I might forget—like random factoids and the conversion factor for pressures when going from mmHg to kPa.

And there you have it. My advice on the hardest lesson I've had to learn along my journey to successful entrepreneur.

Now I ask YOU… the next time someone asks you to push through your comfort zone… are you gonna wing it OR treat it with respect by remembering What Comfort Zones Do For You?

**Author disclaimer: All proceeds from this blog post will be donated to the cuss jar in the kitchen labeled: Food For Thought.**